"Crashing Waves"
By Caroline Sullivan
In solitude I hear the turning of the earth
And the winds of the turning world
I feel the waters that feed the land
And the earth that begets vegetables
And high above are the all knowing stars
And in this brotherhood is peace
A peace that blankets the soft land in rest
And nothing will probably disturb it
All chaos the aliens threaten to end my life
But that is because they are evil
Much dreams have been destroyed by evil
Much of my weeping has been caused by them
But here, here is peace that I have found
And peace as I wait for you
But in your peace, an answer lies
An answer that remedies my heart
I fed him, I rocked him, I nuzzled him
And I probably always will
In this he lived on and I lived on
We lived on together

Poetry is a minnow and then it is a wisp
Then it is a bit of light scurrying across the floor
It is a hope in the night however small
A tiny brave voice calling out to its brethren

To think that, in all created space
God sent you here for a reason
That one day all these material things will be gone
And you will have eternity to think about it
In life, a speck, a spark, insignificant
That you should be torn from me
Is all the reaches of the wide open space
And on the furthest sea
I think I looked for you at time's beginning
That we were destined for each other
In life, all meaning lost, but you and I
And without it there is nothing left
A love story in which I am old
And you are young and beautiful
The suffering in a life where I am old
And you are my guiding light
The muse that peeks up around my doorways
The sun to my stormy nights
The bringer of light to a dark world
And me to write your story
In physical limits my pain eclipses
When I realize I cannot succeed
In you, the beauty of the denizens of time
The loveliness of the dawning sun
Perhaps we were sent here on a mission by God
As spirits limned to bodies
But you and I are struggling now
We are in the very thick of it
Created, we have little
Forgotten, we learn anew
Unloved, we fight that which controls us
To promote the teachings of Christ
If I give you a cup of cold water all is well
It means all is well with the world
To give and give, having little
To fight that which lacks kindness
To overcome that which limits me
And become that which makes me despair
Beams of light cast upon the wall
In a time when experiments ruled
But one day none of this will matter
And one day you and I will be gone
In the fingerprints of a lost time
You and I will remain in memories
But you and I will be cast away then
We will learn to walk again
To be a child in a world that is controlled
To exist under all-controlling parents
To be trapped, to forever be a child
To have one's wings clipped back tight
To never be allowed to fly
Oh children of the future
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

When I am feeling down and low
As though nothing could console me
Your light spirit like the air
In me forever murmuring
No life on that which steals my youth
No life on this my future
I`ll fight the things I was given to fight
And I'll die sooner than later

Little Air Spirit
Faithful and true
No horizon line for you
Your future goes on and on
The pain of these generations
Crying out for release
You'll carry these children on your wings
And vault them into safety
When noone was there to protect you
You stole into the king's castle
You took something of great value
It was I that got you caught
In your agonized screams
I could make out something of an answer
So now you and I sit by these shores
With idleness and little hope
I pull a flower from behind your ear
Because you are still the loveliest thing
But I am an old and ugly thing
Like an elephant among fairies
I will never be your equal
But at least, we may explore together
We may look into mysteries unforetold
And seek the furthest star
"Slave Song"
I cradle you close to my chest
Because you are worth more than the world
In my arms I can hear you praying
I"m carrying you across a threshold
As I have been carried over thresholds by those that loved me
Your ears are soft and velvety as you listen
I hold you close to me
My heart tells me that I must protect you
I know that you are afraid
The sun bleeds across the sky
These are hostile skies now
And you in my arms is my only paradise
There is so much fear now
People are being told they cannot continue on with their lives
People are being killed and tortured
When this happens, just hold them in your arms
Sing to them softly and tell them everything will be okay
Because it will be
They are afraid of losing everything
The diurnal seasons will swing back into balance
The protective spirits of God will take control
These children will surely find safe harbor here
Their fears will find pasture in the ones they love
I knitted you a little satchel of green wool
So I could carry you around as I do housework
These children are frightened and so am I
A house of little frightened children
Fear thick on the lips of the ones trapped
I listen for an answer to resound
But no answer comes but dead grasses and trees
Spring will not come this year
The branches and roots have been killed here
The spring has been chopped off
All this time I lay waiting for a signal
And all that has come has been dead trees
So little given, so little taken
Embraces on long quiet nights
Once the trees held us in their arms
But this year you and I will be alone
And when I hold you in my arms
All my prayers are being prayed for
I do not know how to counter these laws
And people are being killed and tortured
I would give anything to grow old with you
To live with you in peace
But you and I have no rights now
And you and I are as slaves
If only I could comfort you somehow
But we are slaves together
If in holding you I could bring you some comfort
If I could save your life
But there is nothing I can do
And I feel full of despair

The rivers that flow beyond here
Give hope of a better time
All lost, all lost
Many friends are surely dead
Alone on these shores
My cottage is a cottage by the sea
The sea breathes all around here
The sea will keep me company
The darkness of night and the eternity there
The peace in daily life
Every time I take my tea
I feel deeply that I am doing the right thing with my life
And in this knowledge is peace
Peace like the tumbling of waters down your back
Like the fathoms of pain that come and come
If one believes one will overcome it, then they will
they will overcome this and many other things
People come bearing gifts and leave gently
The cities underneath the stars
Answers that lie beyond the great beyond
The way you dance and laugh
Maybe I lost him years ago
But I didn't know I lost him
Maybe I never lost him at all
Maybe he is still with me
The kingdoms of the air were never too great for the porpoise
He dives joyfully in and out of the water
Breathing happiness to be alive
He, too, will conquer all of his challenges
And Theodore will come in his house
Carrying packages full of toys for his children
He will see things so beautiful he will drop his packages
It will happen again and again
When his loved ones lick his face like puppies
And gratefully reach for another donut
He will see his kingdom come
He will find prosperity
Alone I test the colder waters
You resting in my lap
Your precious body wrapped in blankets
I'll forever keep you safe
Cities with golden domes for roofs
Domes ornamented with the crescent moon
Women with ballgowns of royal blue satin
Slipping in and out of the streets
Dissappearing down corridors and going in and out
Carrying little keys on silver chains
Hills that ache with groans of pain
Carrying waters down into the cities
You and I will not be there when the news comes
We will be dancing and smoking by the bonfire
I will be the indian maiden you always dreamed of
My hair will make you cry
My face will be like a fairy face
My feet will be small and soft
We won't be afraid of the night all around
We will feel safe and laugh at danger
Your laugh will champion the lives of children
It will inspire them to conquer great deeds
The one who broke my heart will have puppies and kitties
But I will not be there
I will be cast into the sky with the stars
And you will be my companion
Or I will be stirring the fire and chopping vegetables
I'll miss you like flowers miss the sun
Long days spent alone will teach me things
Like why God makes bad things happen
I'll learn why suffering occurs
Why there's nothing I can do to stop it
Peace will flow and that will be enough
I'll live my life alone
Unable to carve out that destiny dreamed of
The river will help me cry
The river that knows my time on earth
The river that hears my suffering
The trees that teach me how to survive
That teach me about the cure to pain
To endure, to dig down one's roots and survive
Will conquer the great Chaemera
But you are something I've lost in this life
Something that wants to be free
I hope the kitties and puppies lick you
I hope they hug you deeply
I hope you have love I could not give you
Because you didn't want to stay
I hope that you are happy and free
I hope you find your answers
May God bless you in all things
May he bless you abundantly

In the temple I`ll brush the earth with silk slippers
The temple will be open to the world
Surrounded by jungle and in the jungle there are ruins
Ruins of great cities that came before us
Fallen warriors turned into stone statues
Warriors frozen in time with arrows in their heels
Warriors who die reaching for apples and falling
Warriors who stumble upon fearful sights and die
Warriors who didn't ever go into battle
Who died of old age and regret
Warriors who stormed the temple boldly
Warriors smoking cigarrettes
Fallen ones who thought you were pretty
In a way that was not your appearance
People who found peace in your shadow
People who died for you
People who check the great books for your coming
And longingly look for your arrival
I will not be there when the apocalypse comes
I will be dancing a stomping dance with you by the fire
We will feed him sausages when he comes home
He will tell us that he hates us
But eat, hungrily eating and curling up to us
We will find our peace in his arms
i will find your letters and read them all
I will read how you tried to save me
How one died, then they all died
How beasts attacked the barn full of corn
How we barely escaped the wild boar tusks
And you bravely fought them off
Your sword couldn't have been much smaller or sharper
Like a needle fluttering on a fairy's wrist
Your children must have been hungrily eating
When they saw the treasures piled high
I wish we could serve them barbecue meatballs and onion rings
The kind deep-fried to a golden brown
All will be well, all will be well
The lighthouse beckons with its lightbeam
The aliens say all will not be well
But yet we will ignore them
We will ignore them when they want to destroy the earth
God says they are demons
Demons that want to kill and destroy
Demons that come from hell itself
I say we should resist them as best as possible
That we should ignore their threats
Maybe I am ignoring their threats right now
Maybe they want to destroy me
There is so much light and so much hope
And the lighthouse calls, all will be well
All will be well as long as we believe it to be true
And faith is so important
Faith is the difference between winning and losing a battle
Faith gives us the wings of eagles
It equips us to accomplish things we could not accomplish
By faith we live forever
I say we use faith to push the aliens back
Back into eternity
They are only a threat if we believe in them
They can only hurt us if we fear them
May we laugh at them, may they go away
Aliens are evil
This planet is a planet full of light
And you are my sleeping beauty
All is well, and all is well
The chickens are sleeping in the henhouse
The children have their thumbs in their mouths
The mothers are softly singing to themselves
The threats of space shall not overcome
We will overcome them with faith
With singing and laughing and giving gifts
With the joys of Christmas morning
With electric lights and dwellings to live in
With clothes to keep us warm
With beds and blankets and money and shampoo
We will cast them down to hell
If you see their lights in the sky, just look away
Don't look at the lights
Don't give them recognition or place
Ignore them and stay safe
Demons come from dark places
And evil springs up in the kitchen
I see evil spring up in messes after I cook
And in people doing violence
In doctors taking liberties
And people left out in the cold
Noone should be alone in the cold
Noone should be without a comforter
The roses on the horses' necks
were telling us we were winning the race
We'll find some cool mountain cherries
And take communion together
I will always love you, dear
I will love you whatever you choose to do

A down pillow on a down mattress
With fresh, clean white linens
Warm sunlight falling through a window
And lighting up your bed
Some books with pictures of faraway places
Pictures isolate, desolate
Pictures of people freezing on the icebergs of fjords
And people being ravished with sorrows
People in battles and people trekking through mud
People who cannot get free
May you read these books in the starchy warm sunlight
And feel how nice it is just to be comfortable
There are a few more comforting things
Than to be safe when danger is beating all around
When storms are blowing and blizzards are freezing
You'll be safe here in this barn
Safe in a bed of clean dry straw
Safe from the winds that blow
You'll tuck the covers in around your chin
Mothers will put hams in the oven for you meanwhile
Hams with sugar, mustard and pineapple
Your little fingers will be safe and tucked in
Nobody will bother you for anything
A kitty will sleep on your footstool
A kitty that always sleeps
She'll crawl in your lap and nuzzle you
Your mother will come to check on you
You will be a king in your own castle
Whatever you need will be there
The storm will blow on all around
The storm with all its troubles
The storm where the leaders of the free world
Clash powers with each other
Where they charge into battles of wits with you
While you are eating poptarts and potato chips
You'll watch in amazement when they challenge you to duels
And then lose bitterly
You'll watch them lose without doing anything but sit there
Popping popcorn in your mouth
They'll have wars and stop wars in your honor
And they'll give you medals and honors
They'll tell you you're their only friend
They'll curl up with you and rest their head on your shoulder
And tell you you make them feel safe
And all the while you are taking a nice hot bath
Or watching cartoons or reading
Great world events will play out before you
While you live your daily life
You will seem to be a great hero
When you really didn't do anything
Great changes will come in your name
Great people will rise and fall because of you
God is telling you a beautiful fairy tale
While you're laying softly in bed
Some of life's sweetest comforts are lived here
While the world scene rages on
How lucky to be safe in this storm
How great the God who saved us
How merciful He was to keep us warm
When the wars were raging on the blizzard front
Rations are more delicious than ever
Taco dinners are more fun
Cuddles mean more now
And poetry tastes sweeter
Christmas will be brighter than ever
And I will be safe and warm

Little bracelet chain with gold beads
Little green lizards with yellow spots
The crescent moon hangs in the velvet blue sky
Blue and white china cold to the touch
Resting on white lace with little scalloped layers
Little cups of anise seed dipped in sugar candy
Peppermint tea waiting in a heartbroken way
A little scared that you will not need it
It just looks off into the distance in a hopeful way
Biting its lip that you will not see the next sunset
We must pick up our pride and continue going forward
We must all start singing about the things that make us happy
We must become a planet that raises its voice in joyful singing
A planet that sings and reads the songs of one another
There is virtue in singing and writing poetry and talking together
There is a way out in talking and sharing quiet moments together
The gentle communion of breaking bread together
We must find something benevolent to preoccupy ourselves with
Something free for everyone to read and listen to and watch
That is just why art is so important to daily life
Art- poetry, music, performance, photography, invention
We must go forward in all these things, giving and taking together
The world lays open like a vulnerable shell full of the capability of pain
It takes a sensitive ear to listen and hear its needs
The threat from the sky will not abate unless we find something to do
We cannot just lay down in the dirt and die
Children jumping in puddles with hot pink rainboots
Celery stalks arranged on plates with crackers and salami
Pairs of birds resting together in the treetops
Laying out birdseed and peanut butter for the birds
Giving little gifts when you see someone you know
Little sticker books with lace paper heart stickers
Glitter and highlighter for the eyes and cheeks and nose
Milk chocolate with almonds and hazelnuts and raisins
Fried coins of yellow squash dipped in equal parts egg and flour
Dollhouse miniatures of little rugs and magazines and picture frames
Little electric lamps for dollhouse rooms
Chandeliers with heart-shaped crystals dripping down in light
Boxes stuffed with embroidered applique patches and lace
Little turtles with frustrated looks on their faces
They crawl across the sewing notions and wander out of the room
Taxis wandering around the street giving inexpensive rides to public parks
Public parks where people can go to visit one another
To sit on benches and dance to street music and draw with sidewalk chalk
Jumpropes, sidewalk chalk, bubbles and falling water for all to enjoy
Internet libraries full of necessarily free books for anyone to come in and enjoy
The whole wealth of humanity's contributions to art, available to everyone
Rich or poor, young or old, everyone would be able to enjoy these e-books
An end to the things that punish and do harm, no matter whose fault it is
We'd hand out free food and give people mattresses to sleep on
The mattresses would be soft and extra large, and we'd cover them with blankets
And parents wouldn't follow us around telling us what to do
We'd be legally allowed to work and succeed in our dreams
And little koi fish would have a chance to live happy lives
Tomato and meat sauce would be served with noodles and cheese
Koolaid and fruit drinks would be for everyone to enjoy
Bathtubs for all people to wash in and all the soap
Friendly hands reaching down to help you get off the ground
Where you lay with nothing to do and noone to love you
Hands that will take care of you and put you on the right path
Hands that love you and want to hold you to them
Hugs that come easily and often
An end to violence and killing in the name of
Fried chicken sandwiches with little pickles on toast
Warm gloves to warm the fingers when it's cold outside
When the freezing wind seeps into the holes of your clothes
Windbreakers to keep out the wind
Caps made of fur to cover your ears
Yellow daisies with black centers served by your breakfast in bed
In clear glass vases with hot tea and bakery rolls
Children being born and nestled away safely in little baby blankets
Capri Suns to drink wherever you are
Granola bars and sharp cheddar cheese when you're hungry
People tipping their hats to you saying good-day
Granola and fruit and yogurt
Grits boiled in chicken broth with cheese melted in
Grits topped with bacon, corn, and soy sauce
Boardwalks leading into forests with cool ferns listening quietly
People would never have nowhere to go anymore
There would be heat in every car and everyone would have one
Mugs of chili when it snows
Resting in an armchair in the window when it's snowing outside
Potatoes and onions fried until they are dark brown, almost burnt
Until the sugar caramelizes and they taste like candy
Corn with corn meal and butter and a two tablespoons of sugar and a pinch of salt
Chicken broth boiled with peas and onion and peppermint
;Yellow crochet Unwinding itself all over the living room carpet
To the tick-ticking of a pink crochet hook
Apples sauteed in butter and a bit of sugar and cinnamon until they are soft
Grilled cheeses with extra pickles and french fries with ketchup
Books with no purpose, just feel-good books for relaxing
Time to do whatever you want
Little paths to go wherever you want to go in the world
And a car to wander around in
Someone to laugh with when you are happy
Someone to cry with when you are sad
Someone to lay under the stars with together
Spring evening
When the cherry blossoms are pink on the trees
Puddles of petals lay draping the earth beneath them
Streetlamps glow yellow in the twilight
A quiet garden of bushes and trees and sidewalks
I walk softly under them to and from my home
The pool lays waiting like a glass reflection of the sky
And you are my baby bunting
Flower petals draping the lawn
Fresh fruit waiting for you on a picnic table
A blanket by a window with a lamp and a drink
Just sitting, just kicking one's feet
Waking up in the morning after a deep sleep
Having a hamburger when you're hungry
Steak and mashed potatoes when you are getting better
Laying still and getting well
Feeling the strength come back into your body
Rushing into the day's challenges
Soft pink cloth ballerina dolls that smile
Quiet days spent relaxing
Somewhere to go when you get stuck
Something to keep you happy and preoccupied
Something to still your mind
Frozen peaches in the spring
A hug when you need it most
Someone who looks up at you with innocent eyes
Someone who believes in you with all their heart
Someone who looks to you to take care of them
Someone safe and warm
When you are throwing boulders for this person and getting in arguments
You'll be haunted by their trusting eyes
You'll see their eyes looking back at you from the darkness
And you'll long to go to them
Your worst fear will be failing to provide for them
And you'll pray earnestly to God to protect them
The worst thing that could happen is a violent disaster
And it will give you nightmares
Before the sun sets on you
You will buy them pony palaces

Evil seems to be an energy that occurs
It occurs in the world around us
It changes form and concentrates in nodes of energy
Sometimes it is stronger than other times
In some places it is stronger than in others
It occurs in an antagonistic way to nature
In a way that does harm to that which exists
In a way that destroys what is growing
It occurs in dirt and bacteria in a kitchen
In children being bullied on the playground
When people get held back or punished by the government
When people get fired or blackballed
When dolls become angry and start giving you looks
When people run out of things to do
When aliens invade the earth
When aliens inhibit our growth and happiness
When animals cannot find mates
When people get sick
When there isn't enough to go around
When Christmas comes and there isn't enough
When there's nothing to be thankful for
When God gets angry at His children
When people refuse a call to a mission
When people deny what is clearly beautiful
When people are spoiled and don't appreciate their rations
When there isn't anywhere to go
When things are too spread out
When the computer takes control of everything
When people are harmed in any way
Wherever there is hate or resentment
Where jealousy breeds and people lie with a smile
When people hide their emotions
When people take what belongs to someone
When people take a person's posessions
When a person isn't allowed to have possessions
In slavery and stunting of people's freedoms
In wars and harmful government laws
In homeless people forced to beg
When you ask for something and get turned down
When you are forced to lose something
When lawsare preventing you from doing something
When something starts to decay
When people bite the hand that feeds
When people aren't satisfied
When people frighten God away
When they make the divine feel unwelcome
When people lose their faith in God
When they give up and stop hoping
When people are unhappy
In a frown or a cruel word
In animals eating one another
In people buying and selling what they treasure
In aliens when they threaten the creatures of the earth
In their ships across the sky
In aliens when they make appearances
In God when He is afraid
But, there is goodness in those that make him feel better
In those that pick up litter
And whatever comes and goes there is goodness
There is goodness to counter these things
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

Waterlily pad, soft and green
How could you have known that love was dying
When my body had forsaken me
And I grieved in the midst of my woe
For widows grieve when their husbands put them away
And leave them for prettier women
I look out on the spring buds grow
And what a loss I feel
The beasts you tamed upon the rocks
When they cast you upon the altar
Their oyster rocks were violent in their hands
The cathedrals were crying out, sorcery
The dark spectres of the lonely and forsaken
That haunt the night without hope
I have now come to resemble them
And I, too, wander without hope
If there is hope, It is moved to a higher branch
But still stops by for corn in the morning
Happily he hops upon my porch stoop
And tells me the sweetest jokes
Little hope, little hope, what have you brought me today?
He always brings me something to eat or do
And the buds are growing in spite of that which fights against them

The little boats that glimmer on the shore
And you with your fair love
I'll send you a wind to blossom your cheeks
And fill you with hope
Long days entrenched may keep me here
For I am afraid to die
Even though my task is completed
I linger on these shores
Afraid to relinquish suicide
There is no hope for me
All hope has been cast out like a flame
Blown out by the breath of the wind
The children may grow and blossom somewhere
But here there is only mourning
Long nights spent alone and weary days
Lead me further away from God
There is no escape from this tower anymore
There is no face to show to the world
Too ugly to walk in the sun
Too hopeful to take my life
Leads me farther away from God
And into the further reaches
Christ's teachings remind me that I am alone
That there is noone to do unto
Like a problem that noone has time for
I wonder why we were born
If a minnow struggling against the current
Could ever stand on its own
If the world had not been so hard on this boat
Its cargo wouldn't be cast out to sea
The long days spent alone
Draw me closer to something I have not found
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
That hope that was killed here was like light on the sands
Your voice on the morning air
The voice of one who had come wandering
And crashed upon her shores
The rushes blow in the river water
The pagodas shrouded in mist at night
The silent arrival of a black cat
And that which knows but cannot say
The sheath that covers one's nakedness
The streets all cloaked in lamplight
People praying without an answer
Your plentitude when you provide
Until the mist rose off the water
And the steam had left the jungle coast
The frogs sat watching you and I
With an indifference that was kind
Chickens came reeling in and out of the bush
And our canoe was docked safely in the lagoon
We shared a moment that could never be broken
As the stillness was on the earth
In the morning, you and I, by the water

Oh river, river, flow and flow
Flowing into the sun
The trees part their arms to welcome you
And you ask for their forgiveness
The starling swallow that travels here
Will guide you to your destiny
Just follow, follow and she'll guide you there
Into her great mystery
In your embrace, all hope lies there
The creatrix of eternity
That which has killed before will kill again
The spider hiding under a leaf
There is a man who lives in shadow
And the spider woman is his only friend
She wipes his chin when he takes his dinner
Gently, lovingly she kisses him
He has the heart of ten thousand men
And he lost himself to be with her
Lost all, all and everything he had
Yea, he even died for her
Died as a man to become a spirit
And in spirit form he follows her over the earth
Follows her where she mixes honey with her hot tea
Follows her when her back gets sore
He feels pain when she does and when she cries
He is her only comforter
Love does strange and powerful things to the heart
It fills the heart with fear and longing
He has forsaken all he was to follow her
Like a breath of wind or mist on the lake at dawn
His people are praying to him and comforting him
For he has become a spirit
The thing that makes you pray is the holy thing
It is the thing that you should follow
In the grand context of the lives that could be saved
I raise my voice in joyful singing
And all around there was singing
The hands can do many things
They can take or they can give
I say hands were meant to heal people
To ease them of their suffering
And so I will ease your pain, my friend
Oh man who has become a spirit
We'll raise up our voices in joyful singing
And dance out of the temple
Down the steps to where the petals fall
From the weathered branches of the trees
The shrill shriek of the insect cry
And the shaking hands of the frightened
When they pull their hair behind their ears
For now they have no comforter
Maybe you can protect them somehow
Maybe you can press a camelia into their hair
The dark of night lends down her branches
To show where the earth has been suffering
Where pain has made her feel small
And where you can go walking
Where there seems to be no helping things
And little seems to change
But you, you could make a change
You could stop a terrible occurence
The river flows with a fearlessness
Oh slow-moving, deep river
Dragonflies rest on the trees
And turtles sleep in the shallows
But you and I will be dancing here
Under the light of the moon
There will be tomato and meat sauces
And dancing and feasting and laughing
Songbirds will wash their wings in bowls of water
Intently I watch you now
Like the eclipse of the moon or the autumn coming
Your fragrance smells like a newly hatched duckling
And I forsake my vows and kiss you
The underdog will one day be great
And that which suffers today will tomorrow be successful
The little thing that eats will not die
He will grow and grow into an old person
Because God will protect him under divine Protection
And he will not fear his enemies
He'll eat and eat, hungrily reaching for another
And you'll tell him jokes and we'll dance
Remember the bird flying acoss the sky
And the rock hanging over the lake
The way one looks away softly
And the way the heart breaks
Remember the owl and the deer by night
Or the whipporwhill by the shore
They sing because there's hope in sight
The unnatural is the evil
The thing that hunts without form
The thing that takes and takes
Will explode across the sky at night
Like the path of a shooting star
Oh fallen, fallen without hope
The cry of that which consumes us
The chemicals that destroy the lives of so many
The deaths of the innocent
I seek to learn why people die
If they die or they are killed
I seek to end the death and suffering
To bring balm to a wound
Your prayer calls through the forest halls
As though it were made of glass
But you and I will not be there
We will be dancing a stomping dance by the fire
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
All alone, all alone
The City By The Sea
The city where there are horses
And people dancing to rock music
City of graveyards and churches
City where dolphins play
City where sea turtles bring their eggs
City shrouded in spanish moss
City of old trees and saw palmettos
Where the jungle shrills on high
City of wetlands and stretching marsh
Where shells are scattered daintily
City where people work
Cooking in old stone fire kitchens
City of quiet meditation
Among stones that have no name
City of happy new love
City full of kisses
Where antique stores full of ancient lace lay
And crab traps peer off the pier
City of hope, city of dreams
City of secrets and mystery
Where the park reaches languid across the sea
And docks with all their cargo piled high
City of drive thru restaraunts and highways
Where you can cross the sea on the great bridge
City of toys and treasures
City of friendly people
City of hammocks, city of grass
City of dreams
City never to be seen again
City of light
One day I will return forever
Oh City By The Sea
To hold you in my arms at last
To crash upon her shores
To find the thing we were sent forth to see
And know one had done the right thing
To look back on one's life with pride
To have made every moment count
To struggle and to reach her shores
At last, the wearer of fifty rose garlands
These are to be my struggles
The firm, dry wood planks of the boardwalk
And the grey sand crushing under your feet
The soft pillows of heaven when the tide ebbs
And fills your beach with scatters of sea combs
The jewels lain upon her shores
Display the grandeur of God
Be humble and bow when you come into His Kingdom
Or he shall scatter your chariot like chaff
He destroys the evil and lifts high the little
And crashes the waves together
With a loud slap they are joined together
Entwining and folding under the surface
They become one as the waters twist and pull
Feverishly churning in the brine
The creatures dot the speckled sea
Undaunted by the winds that blow
Horses are careening out some fearful horse destiny
Their strong hooves pound the stone tabernacles
And they step with fearless tread
Your voice upon the hoary wind
Finds me here upon the spotted floor
I hear, but hearing, hear not
And your eyes are peering into me
Seeing, they see not
The wind and waves and water
Power surges, and knocks out your sandcastle moat
One wave at a time
The moss hangs low upon the trees
And travelers moor in and out
The roads like little rivers lay
Cooling themselves under the canopy
Old houses lay turning their wide porch fans
And austere quiet houses
Eggs are boiled in water and dye
Bright blue and pink and yellow
Glitter and stickers and colored tissue paper
And lace and beads and gold foil
And you and I shall struggle to draw
The colors of the rainbow upon them
The little things that you do with your heart, do them
The things that you could do
The brave and the good and the hopeful, do that
Do what others have tried and failed to do
Take up their crosses and bear them on
To the frothy hungriness of the sea
Where people fall on their knees and cry hallelujah
Do it for them then
Tell the world that you've had enough of suffering
And make your fiery stand
Set your stone in the wall with pride
Do what you most believe in
Give cup of cold water always
Never do less than that
Frothy wavescaps beaten like meringue
Ask you to join them
The carnival of the sea and her whelps
God's undulating great mystery
The light of dawn at the mouth of the cave
When you are nearing your prize
Soft camel's hair to brush your lips
Where you watch from your soft saucer chair
Children feel safe when they hold their mother's hands
And people have come short of the prize
Many have tried but few have succeeded
And many are killed and tortured
May you find your prize from under your covers
And be safely washed ashore
Safe in a cradle may you be lifted up
And taken into the arms that love you
Much danger whispers among the rushy weeds
Much treachery and death
There are so many mistakes a person can make
One must never lose one's temper
Violence is dangerious and cleanliness is godliness
Clean with a simple heart
Clear off your workspaces and countertops and floors
Bathe softly in the light of the moon
Let your darning come carefully and softly
Your little fingers working like quicksilver
Work patiently and carefully and well
Be sure to do a good job
Then your days will be many and your torments few
Then you can bask in serenity
Be quiet and calm and do what you're told
We must learn to become subservient
While the cask of time flows on overhead
Its great wheel axis shifting, shifting
On the turn of her clear horizons
She will lead you to quiet victory
Be ever present, ever gentle
Take each moment as a tool
A tool with which you can create and work
Serve carefully, quietly
Serve with the pounding of the ocean tides in your feet
And the cadences of the sun
Serve gently and humbly, obey the laws
And you will see your kingdom come
Will see it come in every tomorrow
As you take your pot of coffee
Will see your children slowly grow up
And your loved ones ripen and age
When they smile at you in a hopeful way
May you feel all the more need to keep serving
Like a fairy dancing along the surface of a pond
Just skim the great mystery while you work
So that though you perform the lowliest tasks
Yet you are a part of God's mystery
In order to survive, one must obey
Those that do not obey are killed
Just do what you're told and do it well
In the quietude a wind is growing
It feels the struggles and the sufferings
And it will redeem you in time
Where the eagle flies you'll settle down
A quiet, pleasant place
Money few and far between
We must aquiese and bend like river grasses
We must lay down our pride and bow
The river hears the suffering
She sees the deaths of those who were trapped
All bowing quietly
Everything will be okay
The thing you can learn is to heal
Give meat to the hungry and drink to the thirsty
Ease one another's suffering
Heal with the hands of a true healer
A healer of food and shelter
Not with the hands of the pharisees
Who say they heal, yet do not heal but harm
Doctors who say they heal, but do not heal
Doctors who are causing great harm
But you, when you heal, give good things
And feed and clothe and shelter
Give meat to the hungry and drink to the thirsty
Do nothing to others that causes harm
Give gifts of your sincere and loving heart
Imaginary gifts that come from the mind
Give soft clothes, clean beds, warm water
Give stuffed toys and things and make them feel welcome
Give soap and shampoo and help someone wash themselves
Help others stay warm and dry
A smile, a gentle affirmation, a hug
These things are things that heal
To be a healer means to help someone
And anyone can be a healer
Hands that heal are hands that are worthy
Are hands that are worthy of the Kingdom of God
All pain and tears are stingers each
We cry without an answer
Have peace one to yourselves and be little
And try to do what you are told
In serving others we inherit light
Chinese ladies in pink satin kimonos
With padded bustles on their backs
Tiptoeing daintily across a bridge
That carries them across green water
Their faces are solemn and they are carrying urns
And fabric of satin
Their faces are peaceful and expressionless
With downcast eyes
There is a crane in the water
With a raised leg crouching
He looks about ready to snatch up a fish
A little further on, a handsome man is squatted on the shore
Eyeing the ladies with an eye that is quick to laugh
She blushes and looks away
Oh, river, river, flowing into the sun
Where tide and time and host's begun
When trickling softly through the new leaves
What paradise was born on my brow
That my Lord should come to me
Bearing sweet gifts of pear and walnut
Bearing goat cheese and raspberry vinnaigrette
Nine ladies were brought to the feasting party
And out of all the nine, you didn't like even one
Many more ladies will be introduced to you
But you would rather play with your friends
Ladies with hair like the breath of spring
Ladies with tortoiseshell combs in their locks
But you make a face and walk away
And put your hand to the back of your neck
And stare out into the distance
Where ships are towing through the dark
You would rather be pushing a sailboat out to sea
Then with a laugh we'd hop in together
And chatter in a bickering way
Or you would rather be ice skating ballet
Or eating roast lamb
Nine ladies will have to wait
They may never get the chance with you
I loved going on adventures
I always got punished for them
Some years hence I look back on my struggles
Somebody was always there to knock me back down
Whatever I did would be a failure
And I was patronized and analyzed
Little did they know what I saw with my eyes
For the brutal begets brutality
Those that do unkind things get unkind things
When they are sent mewling back into life
When tragedy strikes them, tis no wonder
No wonder when you stand at the other side
And look back on all the times you were told no
You'll see how they paved their own footpath into hell
And by then it will be too late
Some people don't see the sign of kindness
Sometimes they are blind to beggars
I sometimes get lost in the winter wind
And let myself blow down into the village
Where villagers are baking bread
And slicing vegetables and putting up signs
You pass among them like a ghost
Certain they cannot ever understand you
The zenith flows into the rivers from here
The rivers flow this way
When I am dead I hope it's worth it
For I've sacrificed a lot of treasures
To brush against the back of your hand
Would make me sigh a sigh of release
But you look me in your almond eyes
And ask me what I am talking about
The leagues of time have brought me here
To tell you of this victory on a distant front
But you are not listening to my voice
So I look out to sea
The sea tells me, things come and things go
People come and people go
They leave with the sigh of a branch giving up her leaves
They leave in a sad way that means they are fading
I am fading and there is nothing I can do
So I will be alone when despair comes
Maybe I understand something you don't
Maybe I'm destined to inherit a great mystery
The apricots that please me please not you
Most things do not please you
No matter though for all will be well
A sailboat sails across the water
They were supposed to follow the instructions God gave them
The teachings of Jesus Christ
But they have killed one and stoned the other
And left people with no comforter
They have given people impossible problems
And killed some and stoned the others
People are laying in a growing heap of victims
They have killed because they could
And done unkind things to people
If they had had a heart
Then maybe none of this would have happened
Then maybe there would be a future
But now there is nothing to become
And so there is no future
To wander no more
From pip to pip
Under the silvery moon
Where the grass lays bare
Like the morning snow
And the wind whispers thoughtfully
Far away on the horizon
The dawn of a big boom
A starburst in the night
If you were here I'd hold your hand
But you no longer love me
So I sit alone in meditation
There lay the child in the meadow grass
When the wrath of God passed over here
He was safe and nothing stirred him
And I was ever vigilant
It seems I lay alone here now
With happy thoughts to keep me safe
Tulips budding from crystal vases
And beaches scattered with shells
It is enough just to be happy, I think
Just to be alone and happy
So I sit in the silence and take my tea
People come and go and talk to me
By the light of the silver moon
It is enough to be happy with what one has
To bask in the lace of the dawn
To lay like a fairy under God's green trees
To have breakfast by a fireplace
To roll in the waters like a lamb flopping her ears
To smile with the joy of existence
To run with the wind and grow wings and fly
To plant the seeds that become tomorrow's fruits
To be alone and know you had won
The prize you had always sought
That evil blows had blown back astonished
To hear the people singing
To sing with the people singing
To laugh aloud and have joy
Excelsior from the highest rooftops
And Excelsior in the deepest cevices
Excelsior from the furthest reaches of space
To the drawers of the bedside table
God has scattered the wicked and given peace to the Good
And he has been merciful on those that made mistakes
The floppy ears of the bunny rabbit
And the thoughtful tails of baby fish
Are grateful for this mercy on high
Are grateful for God's Peace
I sing because it's dark at night
I sing because I can
Let all creatures sing because they can
And let them sing on forever
The burrow of the mouse is full
And loaded up with treasures
The Children have bread
And the poets are thinking softly to themselves
The devil's hosts are thrown back
By the sheer will of faith
And I will laugh in the warmth of the sun
Even if I laugh alone
Through the city streets the smell of baking bread
And the shuffle of feet as they come and go
The curtains blowing in the window
And the garden hedge growing on the hill
Through drinking and cars and city lights
Through the city alight in the night
To be lost in a strange city alone
And not know where one is
To be cast down from God's paradise
For the picking of a few flowers
They were beautiful flowers, and I was beautiful
My jeart was full of joy
God's fountains burst up through the streets
And the stores were full of cloths and goods
I felt as though I had escaped something
The world I was leaving behind
How cruel the wind that knocked me down
In my shining moment of triumph
But I have lost much
And you are my only paradise
The little well of stones may tell
That you were a faithful friend
You followed me to the end of the world
You loved me till the end
And when the end was passed you loved me
In a way that I understood
There's safety here beneath the night
And you and I were good
The newspaper blowing restlessly
Is at the foot of those who did not help
The people that walk about on the street
Have nowhere to go
They cannot bathe or eat or relieve themselves
They sit on the street and wait for death
What wouldn't they give for a hot bath
If you see a person stranded, take them in
They are not kind enough to feed them
They don't have the papers they need
That is the reason they die
It won't look after its own
The doctors drug the less fortunate souls
Until they eventually die
That life you save may be your own
For most of us are killed medically
These doctors are killing people with drugs
And the ones they don't kill die on the street
You're desperate, homeless
I kiss you with the intent of one
That would feed you macaroons
So if you see someone in need, take them in
Help them order their identification documents
Watching people eat your food and bathe in your tub
Is actually incredibly rewarding
You are filled with a warm feeling
A feeling that doesn't go away
A happiness in your heart that warms you
In a way that the miserly have not
It's loaves and fishes, loaves and fishes
You learn the beauty of serving others
Learn that there is incredible joy in serving others
Learn the meaning of Christmas
You learn that you can be happy with very little
You find the meaning of life
While the little hungry one gets his dinner and tubby
And isn't that a blessing
The world sings on high with the angels in heaven
And yours may be a life of tenderness
Charity is sweet to both sides
And it is most rewarding
Give meat and drink and shelter
Give and give and give
Selfless people are some of humanity's best
So Give with an open heart
Waves crashing into the shore
Sauteed Mushrooms with Worcestershire Sauce
Hamburgers with gravy
Roast beef with root vegetables
Chicken with lemon and ginger and salt
Chicken with sweet potatoes and goat cheese and jelly
Broth with onion, cabbage, corn and tomatoes
Fruit when you don't feel good
Fruit on a hot day
Stuffed horses for children that have little money
Fried okra deep fried until brown
Jewelry that drips like raindrops
Intricate and fragile jewelry
Jewelry with crystals and wire
Jewelry that looks like tears
The kind that is easily broken
The kind that makes men fall in love
White lamb shearling coats
Something to keep you afloat
Something you can do all day
Some books or music videos
Cold drinks, salty meals
Seasonal meals that change year round
Keeping the house decorations seasonal
Putting one's seasonal stuff out and putting the rest away
Keeping non seasonal objects in a storage closet
Like christmas decorations in summer or garden statues in winter
Feeding the birds from a bird feeder
Letting chickadees feed from your hand
Pet parakeets that you teach to speak english
When they realize they can trust you
Little soft hamsters that sleep in your hand
That you can take care of
Kitties that talk to you without speaking
Thoughtful, kind kitties
Kitties that noone wants
Kitties who are homeless
Homeless people with nowhere to go
And no hope of finding a way out
Homeless people with nothing left
Taking them in and feeding them broccoli and cheese
Fuzzy slippers after a hot bath
Using shower gel all over
Baking cookies for someone you love
Making fried fish on a saturday
Chopping vegetables to put in a soup
Macaroni and cheese after a long day
Fresh blueberries and sugar in water
Fresh sliced peaches
Sitting on a dock and sunning yourself
Just being happy
The happiness when you know you've done a good job
The happiness after hard work or suffering
Drinking hot tea in bed
Watering flowers
Cough drops when you'e indoors after a bath
A Coke when you feel weak
Just kicking your feet in the water
Just feeling happy to be alive
Long days spent thinking in solitude
When your loved one gets home from work

Winter at the beach
A starfish sleeping in the snow
Little windblown grasses on the dunes
Piper birds hopping about the shore
The seafoam froth bubbles and settles
Where your nose is cold in its jacket hood
The lighthouse wavers in the distance
And slowly spectres come towards you
Seashells in a bucket with sand
Pale, weathered, rounded shells
Pink and purple and grey
Ghost crabs skitter back and forth
One has crawled inside a bag of cheetos
The salt surf effortless, effortless
Pounding majestically onto the starry surf
Each beat and crush sending God's grace forth
Like wishes that are being forgotten
The crashing of the surf as it falls without flaw
And crinkles gently into the land
The grey of the water with the foamy froth
And the grey waning clouds in the sky
Suggests that there is a better place than this
Somewhere far distant from this time
Suggests that all is as it should be
That all will someday be well
In the crashing of the sea maybe new children
Will find their way to this shore
Children never before seen
Children who want to learn
Maybe the sea can comfort your heart
When you feel it breaking effortlessly
Like the raggedy heart that loved you
The raggedy heart that loves you still
The chewed on heart that beats in the chest
Of the man that loves you more than life
The heart they pressed from your own bloody chest
To press into the heart of the rikyrak
But he loved you not at all, and ate it
Your suitor ate your heart
Ripping at the flesh with his ivory teeth
At the ceremony of the night people
The bloodthirsty altar that beats within
The rikyrak ate your heart
Then spit it out onto the earth
Where it was found by a man who loved you more than life
He fell down in grief and picked up the heart
And had them thrust it into his own chest instead
So he could keep you with him forever
After the rikyrak madly devoured you
And now, some time later, the one you love most
Comes to you and softly whispers,
"I have your heart beating within my chest
But it is badly damaged now
And so I will not live much longer
But at least I will die with your heart"
Then both of you look down and take hands
And slowly look out to sea
You hand him the handwritten poems
that you had long ago meant to give him
You tell him that you have always loved him
And that you always will
And the rikyrak flies to another tree
And you and I are silent by the shore
Asking the waves for sixty more years
So you two can grow old together
Sixty years to hold one another
Sixty years to play
To sit by the water and kick our feet
And walk barefoot across the grass
To live together by the sea
The desolate, the beautiful
To live by the frothy sea
Against the pink sea roses
To wear my straw sunhat
With my hair blowing about in the wind
To take you out shopping
And eat deviled crab by the pier
Sixty years to wear my wedding veil
To take baths in warm soapy water
Your tattered heart still beating
The tattered heart that was once mine
And here in the caky stardust
Another great secret
To replace my raggedy heart, they gave me your heart
You got mine and I got yours
Now whether we are separated matters not
We will always have each other
And the ocean pounds crushingly
Into the salt shore land
The salt wind still in our hair
Little black goat nibbling the fringe of my skirt
What shall we have for dinner
A fried fish dinner or spaghetti with meatballs
Or a salad with sweet potato
Let's walk by the shore with the look of the sea
And look up with innocent eyes
The love of my life's returned to me
And I've slowly realized
That he who is with me is the one
The one with the raggedy heart
The one I hope to follow to the end
And journey to the furthest star
The one poetry is written for
The one that makes me sing
For without you I could not live
And within my chest you'll forever stay
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
To grow suddenly old
And lose everything
To be a patient of a nursing home
To be young and youthful and sleep
With one's body knocking on death's door
To become a ballerina in a nursing home
And only thirty years old
The world weeps for you
When you are a child of the sea
The coward that has put you there
Is the reason your body is deformed
The reason you look bad in a dress
The reason you were turned into a man
But you and I will weather this
Like dolphins in a stormy sea
We'll swim the depths and surface
And feel true happiness
And you shall tell me I am pretty
When my face is weathered and warped
We'll stand alone together
Alone by the frothy sea
Alone under the mosquito net
Kicking your feet gently
He walks up with a fishing pole
And sits down beside you
Crystal chandeliers fallen from the ceiling
Crystal birds with draping crystal tails
Crystal menagerie, lapis lazuli cool to the touch
And pearls lie draping all over the floor
Pale yellow cashmere and looking out over the rain
The rain is falling in a hopeless way
The lights of the city blur and bleed together
Where you and I are lying safe from the storm
Having a merry heart that gives and gives
Is in its way one meaning of life
Throw orange blossoms when you walk
And grace your paths with soft treading
Dance your way across a lawn of grass
In loose and draping clothing
Be light and airy like the air
And leave out food for those with little
Be merry and joyful and give things away
Give money and time and love
Smile at people you would not have smiled at
Push yourself to love everyone
When the crystal chandelier comes crashing down
As all chandeliers do
Then your life will be something to be proud of
And you can carry it into eternity
So many people are living with the wrong objectives
They are unintentionally unhappy
Laugh at hardships and make merry
Dance in the light of the moon
Eat cucumbers and pineapple
And feed stray cats
Feed all strays and tip your hat
Let your thoughts be pleasant and bright
If you fill your mind with happy images and thoughts
Then you too will be happy
Happiness isn't that hard to find
And it's easy to be happy anywhere
In the bottom of hole there's happiness there
There's happiness in hard labor
And happiness in unpleasant tasks
And in fevers enduring
If one's life is filled with thoughts of dread
One loses the key to happiness
The dolphins know this secret well
They laugh and resurface
Dolphins are brave, for one thing
They do brave things and then laugh about it
Dolphins rescue people who are afraid
They comfort sick and prey animals
They think that cruelty is funny
And they jab the sharks in the bellies
Sharks are grumpy but dolphins are happy
So try to be like a dolphin
Then your heart will be young and your cares few
And you'll laugh with the laugh of the dolphin
Hardship and pain really are funny
You just have to laugh when bad things happen
Gathered Curtains in the doorways
Red oriental rugs
Saucer chairs in the corners
Bare face and freshly washed skin
If you are unattractive, don't hide it
Wear your hair down and walk proud and free
Don't be ashamed of what you look like
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder
Sincerity and honesty is beautiful
One shouldn't have to hide under layers of paint
Don't be afraid to show what you really look like
Truth is a purity of heart
God gives us our appearances in an arbitrary way
There's nothing we can do about our appearances
Eat good food and don't starve yourself
Men like joy and comfort as much as physical beauty
If you can offer someone comfort it is as good as beauty
Just be kind if you want to be loved
The kinder you are, the more you will be loved
Your loved ones will cling to you gently
They'll sigh and draw nearer into you
And you'll find your paradise
People get hungry, people need to rest
They care less about what you look like than you think
It matters more that you are comfortable and kind
Than what you look like
Children have this gift
They have to obey their parents
Sometimes a cheese sandwich is just a cheese sandwich
Sometimes that's all a person really wants
Just a hot bath and a bacon cheddar wrap
And someone to hold them close
We are ceatures who need comfort
And if we don't fill our needs, we die
If we share what we have with one another
Then we can be happy and bright
Iceberg lettuce and bacon and cheddar
Pizza with mushrooms and pineapple
Candy corns when it's been a hard year
Candies in the shape of fruit slices
Candies with fruit juices in them
And cherry gingerale
Hugs and shelters for all people
People coming together and having fun
Everyone dancing and telling stories
Giving with full hearts
Making hot sandwiches when you get home from the doctor
Cooking in a light and regular way
Cooking abundantly with ample ingredients
Cooking with generosity
Piling layers of things you really want to eat
Putting a variety of foods on your plate
A bit of sweet potato and roast meat
And pasta salad and balsamic tomatoes and pie
And sauteed vegetables and rice with butter
And homeade macaroni and cheese
Soft comforter to warm oneself
And a little heater to keep you warm
A reliable small heater that you can keep by your bed
And turn on when you don't feel good
Some balm for your lips and a piece of fruit candy
A feather for your hair
Bangle and chain bracelets
Bracelets that you wear in a resigned way
Bracelets that show off your graces and virtues
Without accusing or doing harm to anyone
Just serving gently and quietly and calmly
Giving with a purity of heart
Living to serve is one meaning of life
If you can learn to give and wear a bracelet while doing it
Then you will gently come into the graces of God
You will discover the meaning of life
Your footpaths will become blessed
Your peace will fill your heart
You will become a blessing and not a blight
If you give with a sincere heart
That take, and so give to the others
Just do this and be happy
When you smile in a tired way
It will show off your inner beauty

All little heaven in you
But now you are far from me
Long wandering over the earth
And along the edge of the sea
Wishing you would come back to me
My heart is gently unraveling
Alone now I wander through chasms of time
Without a comforter

Dolls sit with broken hearts
Because they are unloved
Dolls long to be held and loved
They long for you to play with their dress hems
To roll the fabric between your fingers and sigh
Dolls are lonely creatures
They long to be held and found significant
To be given a place in the house
Little houses can be full of broken hearts
Full of relics and dolls and toys and keepsakes
Full of things that long to be loved
Things that bring peace and comfort
Things that want to make your day brighter
That jump when you play with them
People are that way, and so are dolls
in a lost world they wait longingly on their shelves
Wondering, waiting, watching
For a cricket to rub his legs or the rain to drip down
There are ancient stories in houses full of memory
Sometimes houses are full of pain too
But most houses are full of good memory
Memory like birthday cakes and hot dinners in a dining room
Like embraces and kisses goodbye in a bedroom
Memories of writing poetry at a desk on dark cold nights in an office corner
Memories of lullabies playing softly in a living room

May the fairies bring you magical peace
May your little hut be enchanted
May you value every sunset
May you feel magical in spite of your appearance
May joy fill this house and lightness of spirit
May conversations tinkle like little bells
May there always be something preoccupying
May there be laughter and storytelling
May there be writing and music
May there be food and TV
And may there always be love to guide you
To light the way of all paths
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

Some robin's feathers to warm your feet
All along life's bitter storm
You and I were safe here
And when the storm crashed all around
I did what I had to do to keep you safe
I protected our house with my heart and my mind
I used my thoughts to protect us
A barrier between us and the angry world
So you and I would be safe
Life is deadly and people are cruel
In this mission that ends in death
We are to carry Christ's teachings in the road ahead
In whatever lies before us
Those that do what we were taught to do
That follow Christ's teachings
We often end up dead sooner because
His Way Leads to Paradise
I begin to lose my will to live
As I realize how trapped you and I are
The devil has laid down his snares for me
And I don't know what the afterlife holds
But in my heart I'm letting go
To the things that make others happy
I watch them do violence and feel their wrath
It suggests there is something beyond us
It suggests that they don't know what is going on
And that I have something of value
Something they dearly desire
Something unapparent and invisible
Whatever it is, I believe it is heaven
I believe I am inheriting heaven
That they don't understand God's Laws
And I am grateful that I studied the scripture
That thing that they are trying to get from me
Must surely be the kingdom of heaven
What I don't understand will be revealed
Someday when I'm sleeping under the sun
The laws have constricted the child to the point
That the child struggles to live
And now it may die because of this
And until death it will dearly suffer
All laws are at rest in heaven someday
All laws will be gone and done
I'll be with the one I love the most
In paradise under the sun
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

Baby bunnies sleeping in ruffled newspaper
When a warm smile occurs on your face
Earrings that show off your cheekbones
Shoes baby blue and pink
A Porcelain doll laid away just for you
And she is so happy to see you
Children when they are happy and warm
Doves when they are cooing
Turtles on a log in a sunlit pond
Glass beads cool to the touch
Silver horses running through a snowstorm
A hot meal set down just for you
Fish plipping from under the surface of a pool
That is deep and cold
Waters that seek not to be troubled
Eerie, cold, secret waters
Waters that would bless you in time of need
White clouds reaching across a listless blue sky
And teddy bears warm in the covers
Teddy bears eager for you to get home
And dusky deserts where nothing grows
All the dreams of roads stretching on and on
Roads unexplored that will never be discovered
Rights that will never be realized
Dreams that will never come true
Children that will never be born
All rent the fabric of life has been torn
My love for you like a lead weight on a fishing line
Holding down the lure and tackle
Like somehing given from God
And bees busily feeding their hive
Administering to the flowers with little fuzzy feet
Feet that move with the sureness of the apocalypse
Or me when I cross a precipice
Or circumvent a hole too deep to fathom
Or you when there's a hot meal on the table
Or bunnies snuggled against their mothers
Or chickens when they have enough corn
Or leaders when they are leading
Like dawn when everyone is excited to wake up
And day when there is much to do
Like feet that are happily resting
Or stews to hungry mouths
Like candles lit at christmas
Or me when I get to go shopping
Happiness
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

A basket full of ducklings in the summer sun
Or bread with butter on a table
Soft drapes and an armchair with a book and a blanket
Pools surrounded by green grass
Relatives that are happy to see you
And Pizza when you're hungry
 The ocean in all its magnificence
This little cove wih waves lapping her shores
The world when the face of night is upon it
And darkness in the face of treachery
All light when it peaks over the horizon
And people drowning who are rescued
Clasping hands reaching down to pull you up
When you are drowning in cold water
Hands that have blankets and food
Hands that can take you home
Hands that dry you off and put you by a heater
And place a puppy at your feet
A puppy that longs to be held
A puppy that has no owner
A puppy that you can hold in your arms
And a warm car that you can get into
A car with heat and a backseat
A car window you can look out of
And wonder what led you to this point
And wonder why you are here
Why God intended this destiny for you
And soon you are back home
Warm hands to give you a hot bath
And Pajamas to snuggle into
Blue pajamas with lace sleeves
And a soft bed to get into
A light to turn out when you are tired
And another soft day
Someone who will cook you breakfast
Someone fat and merry
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
The pain that flows over the rocks
Is enough to stop time in its tracks
To cancel out that which was won
And overthrow those that control all things
The pain was powerful and intense
And in all things, suffering
You putting up your hair to wash the dishes
You cleaning softly in the adjoining room
This war was bitterly fought
And nothing was won
The silent way you putter about the house
Encompasses for me all of life's meaning

The thought of my father suddenly afraid
Fills my heart with compassion
That my father could ever be afraid
Or that I could somehow comfort him
That I might bring him some comfort
In a time when all was lost
That thought fills my heart with dreams

Little egg nog little boy
Little gentlemen children seated at a small wooden table
With black velvet caps and matching velvet jackets
And little cropped velvet breeches
Mushroom caps stuffed with cream cheese and parmesan cheese
And baked in the oven for fifteen minutes
Children who like popsicles and graham crackers
Children who cry when things are too hard

 My true love is dandelion clocks on the shore of the sea
Long nights alone have taught me these things
They have taught me that suffering is the meaning of life
That no suffering is too great to bear
And nothing is without the will of God
Now alone, and then alone
I watch the passing of time
You are a rhyme that makes me giggle
You are a promise in my mind
The temples that killed you are put behind me
And in eternity they are cast behind me
That which drained my life shall drain me no more
And I shall laugh at death
The rivers that run through this wilderness
Reveal a sunken tragedy
They tell me of waters beyond here
And how this life is really of little significance
How one life can add up to many lives
And life can start anew
The flowers that bloom today so bright
Are here tomorrow dying
And in their death a memory
That leaves me here alone
Little worry, however, for in eternity
He waits for me forever
That which you see you do not see
And that which you know is not what it is
So that in light all is obliterated
And in nothing will I find my answers

Some little army men to put in your living room
To prowl through the shores of the carpet
Like worlds uncovered that were left unexplored
And women left unraped or pillaged
Like children who really had a chance
And old people growing ever older
Just like this, our army men will explore the carpet
They'll never escape their doom
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
That devil with which you build your temples
Will surely lead you to nought
All these pleasures are fleeting
All these rivers will dry up
All seas will boil before its done
And all will fade away
The earth's crust is breath on a windowpane
And you are my sleeping beauty
All these things that make us happy
Will be gone before we know it
And then you and I will laugh together
For that will be a brighter day for me
All thoughtful I pace this lonely shore
Like my only gaurdian
The only comforter is me now
And my child is having trouble
So let me be for I am watching something
A phenomenon that tells me something
Maybe someday I will come back home
But I'm learning about this thing
And when my day is done
I'll fall into your arms
The silver treasures of the world
Will help me keep this lonely vigil
Until all's done, Farewell, dear friend
I'll meet you on time's everlasting
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

The sign you're seeking for will never come
Just ding dong out fading into history
All that's lost is lost and you are here
And in the darkness is found eternity
That blank look you see looking back at you
Is something you do not understand
You will never understand it
No matter how many times you look at it
It is the reason you were born
It is the reason all candles are snuffed out
And is one reason for the apocalypse
It is the reason people die
And why noone knocks on your door
It is the reason you are ashamed to bathe or speak
It is an unbreakable barrier
Something you can neither penetrate nor understand
It just is what it is
Your loss is the loss of all things that pray
And the lost of the brightest star
In it was eclipsed your own light itself
And in it your dearest hope forgotten
All things lead to it and nothing is left
So just sit and look at the wall
For some people looking at the wall is all there is
Because it is the only thing left to do
Just stare at the wall and prepare to face God
because this has become the test of your life
Staring at the wall is your challenge

The creaky boats where the sails blow out across the water
Led far away from here
Journeying to a shore so distant
That the journey is never reached
Just wandering softly through the night
And putting space between what was behind
To travel without reaching a destination
To journey to familiar shores
To wander like ships in the night
With nowhere to belong
A hopeless wanderer without sight nor sound
But you and I will not be there
I hope God damns those who did these things
For these things caused my destruction
Schizophrenia is a riddle that breaks your heart
When you are trying so hard to get well
It is a surgery, then it is a torment
Then it is wandering with no answer
The God of all things wants me to wander
Like a thing that has found no harbor
Like something rent or torn or faded
That noone could ever want
No more caring who was listening
No more caring for who could hear me
Just thought all flowing over my heart
Just wandering without aim
Noone cares about me any more
Noone wants to be my friend
It doesn't impoverish me too much
The creaking of the stair
The attic with the astrolabe
And me growing colder through time
Colder because I'm further away from love
And growing further each day
A little dandelion will catch me up
And blow me safely away!

The lost look on a doll's face
When you walk out of a room
Not unlike the look on my face
Or the way the room loses its colors
Like the sun setting on a cold dry winter day
When the wind beats the dead grasses in an aimless way
Like a puppy waiting for someone dear to come out and play
Or a bunch of caramel and toffee piled up in ornate wrappers
Like babies pretending to be asleep when they are really listening
Listening to the soft breathing of the drafty house and the sunlight passing
Like mysteries that beckon darkly with the hope of being discovered
Like pink hair ribbons sitting in a drawer on your birthday
Or streamers before a party or coffee cake before guests arrive
Like me sitting here waiting for you to come in here and find me
But you never really find me, so I spend my life alone
Like a little house when nobody is home
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
Little gifts wrapped in red and gold foil
Little metal grasshoppers with gears that moves them
And play music when you wind them up
Metal Butterflies that move their wings with gears
The one you love smiling up at you gratefully
And thanking you with all their heart
Bracelets cool to the touch and rings with big flowers
Chicken and mango and cold drinks on a hot day when you've been working
Children squealing with joy when you look at them
And people dancing in the streets in purple silk clothes
Women throwing flowers and pastel confetti out of high windows
People chewing on fried chicken legs on the curb
Trees drinking up moisture in a cool shady grove
And squirrels jumping from tree to tree
Fried okra and macaroni and cheese in little cups
And little hermit crabs in seashell shops
Seashell shops where seashells cost ten cents each
And you can pick up a basket and pick out a bunch of shells
Containers of different types of shells and starfish and sea creatures
Hot egg rolls and Lo Mein noodles in chinese take out boxes
Passionate kisses before leaving for work
Elaborately gilded books filled with poems and illustrations
Feathers and leather streamers for hair
Roses for women's hair combs
Turquoise anklets with bear and animal charms
Hair sticks to hold up a loose piles of hair
Bracelets with long strands of beads trailing down from the wrist
Marinated Mushrooms used in place of hamburger patties
A Collection of Nutcracker dolls to protect a house year round
Shish kebabs with chunks of Chicken and steak and pineapple and tomato
Tabletop fireplaces that you can turn on and off
Little smokies boiled in barbecue sauce as cocktail weenies
Ten cent feeder goldfish being bought as pets and taken care of
Sidewalk chalk drawings of flowers all over a driveway
Books ot thousands of beautiful stickers
And someone to send them to in handwritten stationary notes
Printing out recipe cards as gifts to people who cook
Printing paper doll sheets from google image search and cutting them out on the floor
Candies in the shape of fruits
Christmas calendars with little animal figurines behind each number
Fruit-flavored chocolates
Fresh fruit dipped in chocolate
Peanut butter custard pie
Paper streamers and balloons decorating walls on a birthday
Pork chops sauteed with apples and cinnamon and butter
Watermelon scooped out with an ice cream scoop
Little red eared slider turtles as pets

Spring Coming
My little bluebird on my finger
Its orange breast  heaving up and down
Feeding it berries and peanut butter
Watching it fly away
Little seedlings peeking up out of the earth timidly
Rolling out a wheel of pottery clay
Writing in books embellished with gold
Little birds waking up to the warmth of the sunlight
Hopping about on the grass
People coming and going down the sidewalk
Darting in and out of their homes
The trees waking up to the coming spring
And the bare branches starting to wake up
Cooking meats and vegetables in skillets
Cleaning rooms and letting sunlight stream in
Opening old containers and redecorating in pastel colors
glass bottles and vases and blue and white porcelain
Eating less to lose a little weight for summer
Spring coming

I went to you but you turned away
And now my heart is unraveling itself
Losing the part that made me me
And making me into something unloved
Letting my heart unwind and float out to sea
Like a boat who must suddenly be going
But where you go my heart goes with you
And where I cannot follow I sit and listen
Listen to the soft drippings of rain
The earth crying with me
I lose the part of me that was you
And the part of you that was me
I'll cast my net into a greener waters
Where a little lamb shakes his bells
The one who comes to me will be my friend
The one who comes is the one to tend to
Raggedy Ann and Andy are all worn out
And so I listen to your stories
Listen to the tales of other creatures
As they come in and out of the seaweed
There is peace here like many seashells
Gathered on the brink of the sea
When danger comes you and I will be together
We'll hold hands and listen to the sounds of eternity
The sounds of eternity playing upon this house like a shell
A shell full of whispers of the memory of the sea
These days spent in quiet passing are gifts to me
Gifts dearly treasured by the edge of the sea
Clam chowder for you when you are feeling afraid
And bacon corn muffins with butter
Kisses for your little bruises when you are tired
And something warm to drink
The wind is blowing out over the water
The wind brings in news and warmth
Soon the wind will be full of new voices
The voices of the born and hatched
Time wheels by on its pendulum

When the aliens invaded Earth, there was oppression
And many people died and were afraid
But as time passed, a beautiful thing happened
The people all joined hands and started singing
Singing together, filled with joy, the planet prayed
Singing and praying and holding hands together
The young and the old, the strong and the weak
Giving joyeous praises to God
They raised their voices and sang to the heavens
And smiled so big like little children
No longer afraid of the shadow that fell across the earth
They sang with the joy in their hearts
Grateful to be alive, this was a joyeous time
The aliens watched from afar
Whether they would destroy us all was no longer relevant
For we had all begun to sing songs of happiness
Songs ringing off the mountaintops
Poems trickling down the stones
Into crevices where peoplle recieved uplifting messages
Messages of hope and faith
Songs of light and laughter and joy
Songs of grattitude for life itself
We sang and sang and it didn't matter anymore
The fear had been blown away by the beauty of singing
And I sang along with them under the close watch of God
And all was well with the earth
And Peace on Earth rang out like little bells
And you and I sang together
We sang together under the stars
Sang in the face of death
And it didn't matter anymore
The universal brotherhood of the Earth
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

If I could go to you
I'd wade out into the water to meet you
I'd run to you and throw my arms around your neck
We'd walk in the rain holding hands
And We'd jump in the puddles with yellow galoshes on
We'd kayak to the far side of the island
And follow the warpath of a shooting star
We'd trace the springs of cold water to their source
And bow in the face of divinity
We'd pray when we came to the chasms of the cathedral
Silently praying together
When the treetops closed in around our path
We'd take hands and go in further
But you are nowhere to be found
Your voice is a leaf in the flapping wind
Your song is the warmth in my beating heart
Your war is whatever I am doing
Your eyes are whatever I'm looking at
Your ways are whatever my heart longs for
And when I am crying it is you that comforts me
And in darkness you my only light
The sea beats on the shore with longing
The sea against the cold black rocks
You and I wil be ready when the end comes to us
We will be ready without any apology
You and I think carefully before we speak
We give with generous hearts
You are the spirit that lives inside me
The breath that moves my body
Where you are I cannot explain
You are the luck that protects me
I will never fear evil because of your presence
You are lovingly watching over me
In darkness I stumble not
In trouble I have your comfort
No weathers nor winds can blow me down
For you are here, oh you are with me
Oh Spirit everlasting
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
Cruelty is fathomless
It's a substance deep and terrible
Something that groans when the mountaina raise up
When they press up through the earth
Cruelty is God punishing us
It's God speaking through those that harm us
Cruelty is a sweet dream
It's waking up with nothing
It's having nothing and nowhere to go
Cruelty is God's way of dealing with pain
I pray when it happens
I sit and feel the pain when people strike me
I feel it, I listen to what I am being given
That is all that one can do
The rain that falls on the dry quenched earth
Knows something that makes cruelty benign
Something that makes it unable to pursue its dark interests
It knows that the snares are set in vain
That even if a person suffers, it does no real difference
It doesn't impoverish the spirit that lives in them
The spirit of a person goes on and on
I wrote these books about love and the heart
I wrote about how love eventually conquers all
I still believe in love after all the suffering
I am no longer worried about the afterlife
If good, good, if bad, bad
But the truths that are represented are eternal
And in the darkness there is light
And in the light there is darkness
And in the desperate acts of those that kill
The humble growth of inhibited hope
In you sprang up a thousand seeds
In you the theory of the apocalypse
In me, the realization of a thousand wounds
And all that was inside you
The destroyer springs up its snares in vain
And on this crystalline fact lay the ideals
Like candles in a candelabra
They uphold the truths that cause all life
Blueblack horses crossing a wide meadow
To get to the other side
In blueblack horses the hope of the world
The reason for the changing seasons
When blueblack horses run across the plain
God's heart soars like the clouds in the sky
In you a blueblack horse to see you through
In you the secrets of eternity
Children are born and when they suffer
God is with them in their trials
That which you were given was assigned to you
Don't trouble yourself too much
All things coming or going
All things crying out the brotherhood of mankind
The toys that made me smile so bright
Will someday be gone
And in me the suffering of that which kills
In me the bringing to birth
In you the killing of the innocent
The death of the sparrow
When he dies, then I shall die too
No longer afraid of death
Asleep, asleep, and that is all
Just falling off to sleep
Your silence marks the design of all things
It marks the reason you were born
God willing, we will go on
But God not willing, we die
All things died that cruel night
But I believe he did it out of stupidity
Maybe because of the wrongs that were inflicted there
Maybe i deserved it
But either way, now I head for the far shore
I must continue my journey alone
My paths are blessed and my companion
He is grateful for what he has
I think Theodore is my soulmate now
When I look up at the sky, I see his face
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
The peace of the rain falling down
And all my revenges
I am not sorry for my revenges
But they make me deeply sad
Sometimes one gets a just revenge
And then feels sad
All this was lost in the great architecture of it all
I am losing parts of myself
I am losing the physical body that has carried me
It is falling to the dust
Soon it will no longer exist
Soon I will be gathered back into eternity
But you, you will wear flowers in your hair
I'll give you something of great value
Something that fills your belly up
Something nourishing and warm
And in this nourishing and warm you'll stay alive
In that truth I will find my peace
And when it is lost the wind will scatter it
You and I will be lost upon the sea
Our bodies cast aside like easter grass
We will become the thing we sought to please
Then there will be help and meaning
Then I will set you free
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
When I see you there suffering I feel less pain now
Because I know it's just an illusion of the mind
I know your spirit lives on and on in eternity
And that gives me peace
Maybe the kindest thing I could do
Is to sit beside you and join you
So we will suffer together
We will share what we have together
in Jesus' Name,
Amen

I loved you dearly like running water
Falling over my quenched heart
I loved you like the deer in the meadow at sundown
Like rivers flowing to my shore
The thing that destroyed you destroyed me too
And it will destroy us again and again
It destroyed our brother Theodore
And it destroyed our house
Our house was dearly beloved
We shall miss it
Someday you and I will walk in the sun
Someday when our time is done
I hope we laugh about now
I hope we throw things and make messes
In eternity there is you and I on a playground
We are forever making mudpies
You are one of my soulmates
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
A little cottage where you can just sit and be happy
And in the dusk you come to me
When all seems lost and fallen apart
You hold me in your arms
The world falls and falls all around me
The disasters are so many I get confused
A storm that blows all around me
And there seems to be nothing left
I hope you will hold me when all is lost
I hope you keep me safe
I am learning to trust you slowly
That you know what is best
In you the feeling of safety
The beating of the drum
The attackers come and come
In my heart, there is only you
When I was lost I reached for your hand
And found it among the ruins
My body has forsaken me
I am waiting to be destroyed
Yet in all hope, some tragedy
In what you have, the possibility of light
Things that hurt us are overcoming us
They are getting closer and closer
Soon they will be upon us
Soon I will relinquish my breath
It makes me wonder If God is what He is
It makes me look for another
One who understands the plight of the misfortunate
A God of love and compassion
This God is a God of revenge and wrath
Lord knows my heart is breaking
The things I am setting down before him
The ways I pray with all of my heart
My destruction comes surely soon
I cannot last much longer
The people who speak are consuming me
They are taking control of my future
They are trying to kill me
I am afraid of them
In all things, we were trapped here
And the kind has become unkind
All this sorrow has eclipsed me
These people are upon us
The spark, the spark, but the spark is dying
The spark is being put out
The life will be gone if things don't get better
And there will be no more to say
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Through Roaring Waves"
By Caroline Sullivan
To My Muse, Theodore, And  To  My Imaginary Friend, Ptolemy,
Who helped me Write This Book. You are loved.

The snow is beating hard and fast
A cat creeps out into the silent snow
Her feet padding holes into the snow
And disappears as quietly as she came
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"The Lost Children"
Some Lost Children of the night
Are wandering without sound
From under the dark doorways of the poor
They're creeping out hand in hand
Soft nests of brown tuft tucked under
And in their eyes is a hunger
They creep into the night on the back of the dragon
That carries them softly into the city
The lights are lit with low somnolent rumour
And ghosts prowl the sides of the lonely streets
Without purpose they wander because they are not
And little ones nesting wait with eager hearts
Until the great palace chants beating, beating
The drums crying for human sacrifice
Blood pulses in the ears where the people chant
Dancing with rhythmical movements
And the warriors vie for the onlookers
And I cannot help but feel afraid
If I am an ancient queen
And the Nile carries me further away
What will the dancers do to me
Should I reveal that I am afraid
But they are not afraid, no they are angry
As they pound their feet and lean forward
All lost, all lost I watch them
I'm holding your little hand
Holding it safe inside of my own
Because you are more important than the world
And suddenly the horns ring out
Like angels in long white robes
Then gifts are lain at the children's feet
They throw toys at their feet as they sing hymns
The children watch silently with big surprised eyes
And listen to the eerie and beautiful singing
They are served pillowy warm fried cakes
And while they eat, there is dancing
The boy cries out excited with joy
And the girl listens quietly
They creep back into the night in the dark
On the back of their trusty dragon
And fishbowls of light glimmer on the shores
Of the waters that mark the way home
If beggars come softly to your door
Then turn them not away
Feed them pillowy fried cakes and dance
And throw toys at their feet and sing
For verily this is Christmas Day
And this is the meaning of Christmas
To eat and be merry and give
And to love one another
To do unto one another
As you would have them do unto you
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
"Your hand"
When I came in to bed tonight
Your hand was stretched across my pillow
And you were deep in sleep
The span of your fingers marks all things
The distance between two points
The reasons I cry on my birthday
And the one Christmas gift you never put down
The reasons some people never get to be happy
And why young children cry
All hope for you in your heart
Was the distance between your fingers
Like dolphins curbing the ivory coast
Or flowers alight in your hair
Your beauty was born of briefness
That I will not always be there
The pain in your outstretched arms
Encompassed for me all of life's meaning
It's sleeping in the flames like a puppy
It's underneath the snow
It's when you are most afraid
That you get the closest to it
And things that are hidden in packages
And things that are too late to be learned
Things lost without an answer
And things that will never be found
"Oh Wife," your fingers whispered
As I pulled back the covers
No more to be your protector
But many leagues till then
Let's take what we are given
And enjoy that which we have
Your long, tapered fingers tell everything
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
Oh light without a second hope
And light without an answer
Oh light with nowhere to escape to
And light with nothing to do
Oh innocent beings that suffer
And people without a home
Why is God's child crying
Why is someone all alone
Why has God forsaken someone
Who tried so hard to praise him
What if that one praises him still
Oh, won't that shake the rafters
What if he finds meaning in all the chaos
What if he finds a way through
What if there's hope in the silence
What will hell's borders do
What if the answer he sought
Is within some little flower
What if there's hope in the future
What if he finds some magic power
What if God comes to comfort him
In his Island of despair
Will the powers that Be, be shaken then
Will that which takes despair
Will he find his way through night and day
To the ivory coast of the shore
Sometimes living's not the highest gift
Sometimes there are more important powers
So when you hear of this prisoner
Wish upon a star for him
He's carrying the cross of Christ
And some hairpins and candy
What then, Oh Lord
Will you deliver our helpless soldier
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
Under the stars, the still white stars
Our hero is alone tonight
All swallowed up in the doom of all things
He endures like a little dandelion
With nothing there to protect him
He pines away with his conscience
Alone and without comfort
It's a terrible way to go
And if there is anyone to help him
His help must come from afar
The lights in the sky that guide this child
The shining of the stars
Don't you know his dreams are sweet
And his nights must be so long
The hero with the courage to try
And the little voice that comforts him
What hope is there for He?

Softly brushed onto low-hanging boughs of fir
The snow hangs heavy like fresh biscuits
And the dark cool green of the trees are thinking
Beneath them, sorting out the problem of the snow
That holds their fragile needles down
The sun is high and piercing in a blank blue sky
The snow has already fallen in the night
One can pad out in the snow with tender feet
And it creaks like a rocker under a grandmother's weight
The trees drinking the cold icewater from beneath
And one must struggle to breathe in
It is so still in the pine forest
Inside the cabin there are oranges scattered on a wooden table
And you can walk back inside and shut the door softly
While the heat surrounds you and takes off your coat
You peel an orange all in one peeling in a spiral
And lay your crocheted hat down on the table beside the oranges
And warm yourself to the heater that makes the electric buzz
And look at a magazine that takes you faraway
The bed is made up in the corner with a blue, white and red quilt
And your boots are laying against the side of it
Corner pulled back to show a soft set of sheets
And the refrigerator is full of salami and cheese
There is a photogeraph of someone expected for Christmas
And a radio beside your bed
You take off your clothes and crawl into bed
And turn on the radio and listen to the oldies
And stare off into space
Hugging yourself to yourself and thinking
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

'Listening"
A Cathedral lying gently in the snow
Of a long, dark and cold night
Inside, there is a lady praying
She repeats the words over and over
With her hands folded softly together
The winter night swirls on and on
But she is still praying to herself
She rises and silently leaves
Walking through the snow to get home
The snow piles up against the door
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

In hope a light that saves the drowning
The light at the edge of the dawn
Troubles must pass eventually
The storm must settle down
That hell through which you navigate
Will be overcome eventually
And for your deeds to those you meet
May you inherit eternity
I sent you hope in a letter once
I sealed it with a prayer
The storm blows on but it endures
I'm writing you yet another
Clash of kingdoms and pride of lords
All Gods requiring obeisance
But as for us, we will be safe here
We will not pray to anyone
Sustained by the life forces of time
There will be safety here
And you shall have a hobby horse
And a place to lie your head
Of misfortunes there are many still
They cry from across the door
Yet safe are you and I my child
We'll eat sandwiches together
Physical beauty is overrated
And so is success and fame
Intelligence is overrated too
And I often walk alone
When the Gods swear revenge on you
Just smile and walk on
Revenge and jealousy are thorns to me
But still I endure and continue
Heads bowed with suffering, we walk on
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

Where waters flow in darkness there is light
Where the adult child lays forsaken by God
Where the discouraged are knocked down yet again
Where there is hardship, there is light
In the forsaken, meaning
And in things forgotten, eternity
The waters that feed the land are feeding us all
And through the black storm, a light
Through oppression, deliverance
And through torture, the startling clearness of revelation
When one door closes, another opens
And that which is most forsaken wins
The world lays still under the stars
Waiting for a sign from heaven
In my heart, a blizzard blows on and on
Day after day the snow falls in darkness
And forms press into and out of it
Speaking with me as friends
I listen and I learn things about them
About struggles and the rules of the rulers
I learn about pain when they torture me
And when they bring gifts I am grateful
Beyond them the waters are flowing through the dark
With a steadiness that steadies me
All things coming or going are passing without harm
Without struggle and without evil
Once I was a beautiful girl but now I have grown old
My pain seeps into the water
It becomes part of the earth and I lose place and time
I become that which I was writing about
When I die I hope to become the things I wrote about
The still and the intricate and the cold and bright
Like snowflakes cut out of aluminum or porcelain dolls
I hope to overcome that which overcomes me
All goodness is energy that flows and unflows
It echoes in the sounds of creation
Your voice and my heart and the water and the night
All things lost and forgotten
In peace the hope that lives on unrelinquished
In hope the final answer
The vagabond that wanders through the desert forever
Is calling me by the name
I follow the star that wanders without settling on anything
And that which expects nothing of me
Just peace that falls like the endless chain of being
And destiny that leads me there
All wandering without form the nameless hunters
That hunt without wanting to heal
Are thirsty for blood that is not their own
But you and I will not be there
May we be undestroyed when the fever sets in
May we overcome that which overcomes
May the forsaken be raised and the prosperous thrown down
May the little crawl out from the corn
May that which had nothing have something at last
And may nothing be killed or tortured
List listen to the voice of the wind that blows
And in that find sustenance and peace
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Godless Faith"
When I look out across the water I see a truth
A truth that has no face or name
It's glowing in the night and all around
And I hear it in the blowing of the wind
And the steam that leaves my mouth it endures
Bringing answers from far across the dark and light
Like rivers without purpose it flows in the night
Like plants that grow through tillage or fairies in the night
Like kittens learning to fend for themselves
Or people without a God in things they cannot understand
Whispering words of hope to the lost and downtrodden
And it has no face and no name
I continue on in my little life with hope
Where there is no hope yet still I hope on
And Gods will fall and rise but I
I will endure with this all-enduring spirit
Telling me everything is going to be okay
Some people belong to primordial forces
Some people know who they are
I'll follow my truth into the blue mountains
And hide there with all the happiness I've found
I'll keep it in my heart like origami
And brush the earth without a sound
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

The lights glow on in the green-black night
The trees tall and vigilant like knights in shining armor
You just stand there and feel the night tingling against your skin
And the insects cry out in anger under the low-hanging moon
Long nights have I journeyed to your weary shores
And now here I must crash down at your feet
You live and you try and you fall down and die
The pennies that you earned are scattered on the wind
All that's gained is suddenly lost again
And what you worked so hard to win is lost
But in your grief I find a meaning that is substantial
And crashing waves rush ahead for your victory
They take back the part of you that was lost
They take it back into the dark and lonesome eternity
It's lost and no one can get it back again
But there's meaning in the tears that are shed
Maybe we must suffer to go home again
Maybe suffering is necessary to the returning
I fell down at your feet and asked for mercy
I didn't know what you would do
You smiled and told me to get up and help you
And I did it without fear
We'll go on this way a million miles
A million miles and eternity
Let's get lost in eternity
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
I hope you wear galoshes and chase your dragon
That there is always somewhere warm to go afterwards
I hope you find the answer to your geometry problem
And that your flaws are their own grace
I hope you understand love and physical forces
Like a weaving that follow seamlessly together
A cloth that weave themselves in and out
Or a winding road that leads you all the way home
I hope there's always enough of everything
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Love One Another"
And when I'm finally tired and lost
And my legs and body have failed me
When there's nothing left to go on
When we run out of luck at last
I guess we'll dry up like leaves in the chaff
I guess we'll die in pain
Perhaps there is no answer to that question
Perhaps I'll never see you again
To kill that which cries is what they do
And It's a better way to go at last
You cry and fight for the one you love
And you do it till it kills you
Sometimes death is the only way out
Sometimes you're trapped and have no way out
I dearly hope you cry your little heart out
I pray you cry until they finally kill you
There is only so much we can do to fight evil
Sometimes it is the purity of heart that wins
The purity of simple broken tears that fall
The tears that save the world
When terrible is too cruel to understand it
Just return it by being too kind
Kindness and love really are the way out of life
They really are the answer to all this suffering
Love and Kindness are the answer to cheese fries and tv
And walking in the rain and working to provide
Because aliens wander that lonesome galaxy on and on
Yet they aren't getting any closer to what they seek
The answer to that question wasn't anything of geometry
It wasn't in connecting one point to another
The answer wasn't in fuel tanks or provisions or staying warm
Though those things are sweet to the soul
The answer wasn't in wandering or fighting or eating gourmet food
It wasn't in money under the Christmas tree
It wasn't in fancy cars or a clean doctor's bill
It wasn't in being warm or having a place to go
The answer's symbolized briefly in the Christ Child
And it is felt most strongly at Christmas
It's when people sacrifice their needs for one another
When people give what they have to their friends
In smiles and greetings and second chances and forgiveness
In having fun and dancing and sharing secrets together
The answer is in the reasons we cry
It's in the reason it hurts to be alone
It's why we feel so safe and warm when we're loved
And why our hearts break when we are unloved
Don't throw things at others, don't be cold
And give what you have to your fellow man
Be good to yourself because self-love is important too
Self-love is crucial to being happy
You can be homeless and still love yourself
You can be perfectly happy with nothing
Just to sit still and be perfectly happy
Just to smile at a pretty sunset
Life is pleasant and the sweetest smile
Comes from those with the least things
There is a freedom in being kind and giving things away
It doesn't matter how much or how little you have
To sit on the side of the road and eat chili fries
And to be grateful as anything for your warm shoes
To be grateful for whatever you have and give things away
To dance every day of your life
The world lays like an oyster waiting to be opened
And the body is capable of feeling so much pain
Don't focus on the pain just let it all go
Pain is fleeting like an April snow
Just take what you are given and partake with God
And love one another
In Jesus' Name,
Amen
Your white gloved hand tucked softly into your jacket sleeve
You and I are disabled together
When you are weary I lay down beside you
And pray God give you strength to come and play soon
I love to run and jump beside you
And listen to your stories
You tell me of things that I cannot see
And of the way of the world beyond me
Comings and goings of people who are great
You greet them with warmth and embrace them
I listen while you introduce them to me
But I rarely know what to say
The chickens in the henyard go peck, peck, peck
The crab soup on the stove boils the edge away
Little licked orange kitten goes mew, mew
Big splashy sunflowers that smile back at me
And grey chiffon and pink tulle that looks like baby clouds
There he sits among my thoughts like a crocus in the snow
And beams so brightly I bow my nose to the ground
"All hail,"  Chris chants waving fern leaves as fans
And sets the stars like little candles on tilt
I'm lucky to be part of this grand assembly
Cutting snowflakes out of crispy white paper
The great shifting dragon overhead creaks with age as he flies
Time shifts on its steadily wheeling astrolabe
The dream castle floats through time and space
On baby blue cloudpuffs that suggests another place
I listen to your stories as you take on physical agony
Yet still within your spirit remains unchanging
Those that do not believe in the afterlife
Destroy that mortal paradise that you call your home
The body that helped you realize your destiny
And all the mind that has a physical state
Yet you are you, and you are unchanging
Like a star penetrating through darkest night
The fairest of the mortals for a reason
And kind and brave and generous in heart
You followed innocence on and on through life
Through storms and leagues of pain
Endeavors of pain that threatened to capsize your little body
The catechisms of torture as they destroyed you
That little heart that beats and beats
And waters that ebb aound your feet
Ten kitties to lick you and sit in your lap
purring and gazing at you
Ten kingdoms for you to command and explore
Ten maidens as fair as a winter night
Ten horses to carry your sled through the night
Ten drummers to beat out the tribal rhythms
Ten dancers with pink ribbon wands from their hands
Ten poets to glorify your story
Ten villages to worship you
Ten wishes every day
Ten meals to fill your belly up
Ten closets of clothes to fit your whim
Ten dressmakers to design your dreams
And ten directors to direct your stories
Ten Gods to protect you from harm
Ten angels to gaurd your paths
Ten ways for you to go each choice
And ten magic powers
Al these things I wish for you

Brilliant bright snow in the light of day
The melting ice cracking and breaking
From branches that shift their weight softly
As though not to disturb the living
Puddles of melted snow form in the streets
They flow down the road and into the drain
Cold so painful, yet beautiful
Though now cold weather seems cruel
This little heater may keep you warm
Undaunted by the winds that blow
I'll bless you with it soon
Then your cheeks can glow
Oh winter that was so beautiful to me
When I never thought I would be cold
Now I look on Winter as a dangerous time
Of my little one trapped in the snow
But quiet beautiful, eerie beautiful
Cold with its biting touch
Should it drain your cheeks of their warmth
When you are out away from home
Yet just now Winter is beautiful

Some things I never got to tell you
That you have the prettiest eyes I have ever seen
That time stops whenever you walk into the room
It just stops and my heart is the only thing I can feel
You look at me and everything I do takes place according to you
If you lift a finger I want you to find peace
Whatever you want me to do, I do
If all is lost and I tumble into the sea
Then at least I will have these moments with you

The willow's fingers trail through the water
I come slowly to the window and touch the lace curtains
And sunlight warms my face as I look out onto the scene
The soft touches of grace that fringes my cheek
Will grow out slowly as time treks on
The coffeemaker chuffs steam and hot tea waits therein
A book under a blanket
Wriggling your toes with the feeling of being alive
And all things comfortable and easy
The cat is gnawing at a ball of yarn in the corner
Ducks waddle around the corner and wander off
The fringe of hair falls onto my forehead with understanding
The curtains suggest premonitions of good things to come

To live moment by moment
grateful just to be alive
to feel one's fingers moving
To be clothed and safe
To be clean and well
To be aware of the present moment
And not want any more than one already has
To dream dreams and let that be enough
To be thoughtful instead of rich
Just sit and be grateful for existence
To be grateful to be alive
Suffering is so common
People are struggling for basic necessities
What's there is there
And it's all there is
To be calm and thoughtful
In a time when little is
This is very important to happiness
In Jesus' name,
Amen

The temple foundations shuddered deeply
Cracks etched into the columns
The light within was not shaken
But the columns were struggling
The earth shook under its weight
The priest was leaving bouquets
Of herbs at the altar and smiling
He was telling God a story
About a memory of a girl he loved
The temple walls were falling but he,
he couldn't stop thinking about this girl he loved
And deeply grateful, He was praying softly
For the bounty from heaven that had brought her
He suggested that time seemed to stop when he saw her
Everything within him froze when she walked in
And that, that was the most beautiful thing about his life
Then the girl he loved entered the temple softly
And as her feet graced the floor the shaking stopped
The wind blew in her hair and he turned to face her
She walked up and kissed him near his ear
and together they took hands and walked out
The petals fell from the branches
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

 "Breakfast In Bed"
This bouquet of flowers I'll leave here for you
On a tray with a glass of milk and bread with butter
Dandelions and meadow flowers tied up in string
You're sleeping hard on your pillow
I'll open the curtains and turn on the TV
And put out your slippers
I love you very much and I'm glad you're okay
You fill my days with sunshine in so many ways

I went to the window to look for you
A beam of sunlight shone down upon me there
Like hope that everything might be okay
Or light in a time of darkness

In suffering a light that saves the drowning
In suffering the bringing of light
Through suffering we are made pure of heart
And paradise beyond
Oh, to be at the other side of this life
And to know you had done something beautiful
The time we have here is a chance to help
To help others, to help God
To plant flowers and cook meals and scrub floors
To hand out clothes to the needy
To endure suffering that many would have died
To do the best one can

"Summer Morning"
A church in the pine forest on a summer morning
Tall red and gold stained glass hangs solemnly
The early sunlight causes steam to rise
Up from the pine needle floor and into the air
The boughs of trees hang heavy in the hot air
Cicadas sing expectantly, waiting
There is noone there to pray   A pair of bluebirds color the scene
And a blackbird with a splash of red
Blackberries hang unpicked on a thorn bush
The birds are eating them and twitting
Far away, the sound of cars going down a highway
A deserted forest
The white clapboard church like the doom of all things
And the hot morning wild and savage
There is noone there to mourn and noone to pray
So anyone who enters is welcome
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Lovers"
If you are wild a pirate will love you dearly
And he will take you on his scavaging adventures
The Pirate captain will marry you and make you his Pirate Queen
Rebelling from the government and giving to the poor
And pulling the petticoats of the rich and tipping hats to poor milkmaids
Who smile gratefully, blush and look down shyly
And the pirates go on in the night
Drinking and chasing beautiful men and women of all sorts
Falling in love with whoever they want
Eating good food and watching the shows
And dancing a jig on the government's nose
Then taking the milkmaiden out for a strawberry milkshake
And making love to her warmly on the dirt floor of the hut
Drinking milk out of a pail and watching her churn butter
The pirate captain loves to watch her work

If you are quiet and well-behaved you can love a gentle shepherd boy
If when he raps at your door for shelter, you let him in
He lays in bed like a young fawn on the grass
If you are quiet and good,then this is the one for you
But If the pirate captain comes home from a brawl and finds you
Then they both will doubtless start crying unhappy tears
And if you don't comfort them both they will get sick
So love them both in due season
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

A Whole Chicken roasted with a bouquet of fresh herbs and a lemon slice inside the cavity of the chicken to flavor the meat
Pork chops sauteed in butter with apple slices, nutmeg and cinnamon
Chicken sauteed with chopped ginger root, lemon juice and salt
Salmon baked atop cabbage with soy sauce and ginger
 served with grits boiled in chicken broth
Rice boiled in onion and broth and mixed with melted cheddar cheese
Tuna fish with mayonaise, celery, cheddar cheese and noodles
Boiled diced bellpepper with cream cheese and parmesan
Steak with soy sauce and mashed potatoes
Two loaves of bread from the market
And a bouquet of fresh flowers for you
Butter for your bread
And some of those little lace cookies
The kind that come in the box
Blueberries and peaches
And some sliced roast beef
A block of colby cheese
And a liter of coke
Some fruity candy
And a head of cabbage
Some chicken broth to boil the cabbage in
And canned tomatoes for the cabbage
Some hamburger meat to make chili
And canned beans and tomatoes and chopped onion to make the chili
Little pots of herb plants to put by the windowsill
And cakes with frosting
Someone to hold you in their arms
And eat greedily when you feed them
Someone to make the bed for
Someone who will sleep like a baby Someone who needs much
Someone with bright little eyes full of hope
Someone who loves you
In Jesus' name,
Amen

"Tenderness"
Oh tenderness was the reason for war
It was the reason for all mankind's suffering
The tears shed were shed for tenderness
And it was tenderness sleeping in the bed at home
We cry because of tenderness
And sometimes die because of tenderness
Sometimes tenderness is the only thing that keeps one going
It's what keeps the stars apart
Tenderness when you hold me while I sleep
Tenderness when I start crying from anguish
Tenderness when I contemplated suicide
And tenderness when I decided to live on for you instead
Tenderness when I crashed into bed beside you
Tenderness in taping gifts under the tree
In kisses goodbye before a long journey
In suddenly hearing you come home
What is the thing that pulls our hearts so
The ache inside when something acute has happened
What is pain and longing when noone loves you
Why do we do the things we do to ourselves
Where is God when the pain is greater than the will to live
The ache when we want to let go and slip away
Why does death offer such a final rest
When pain is an ocean to slip through
I held the weapon to myself and prayed
Prayed that I wouldn't do what I wanted to do
But most of all, I prayed that God would ease my pain
In a way that would not involve death
Prayed for tenderness to absolve my grief
Prayed for an answer, somehow, someway
I didn't know what to do with the pain anymore
Suddenly, I heard a small sweet angel's voice stop my hand
It was Ptolemy.  He had been watching me unseen
"Don't do it," he whispered in a little, frightened way
I had forgotten that he was there
Then he started crying in a broken way
Like he needed my help and didn't know what to do
Then he put his arms around me
I put down the weapon, suprised, and we kept going
We have been going ever since
What is tenderness that saved my life that day
That gave me something to live for
What pain was answered to my prayer
What creator heard me suffering
How soft my bedsheets were that night
As I lay warm and soft and grateful for my life
How glad I was to see Theodore's concerned face
When he got home that night! Oh how glad to be safe again
Oh how glad to be warm
Tenderness is the cause of so much pain
It often causes people to end their lives
It also causes the passionate ecstasy of love
And the tenderness with which we hold our beloved
It was tenderness that led me to that height
And tenderness that saved my life
It hurts to feel unloved
And feeling loved is everything
Tears and pain are a terrible thing
Oh if only there was an answer
I attribute this quality to something unseen in mortal life
To something unknown beyond the veil of death
There must be something there we mortals cannot see
That leads us to these heights of passion
Something divine, something magical
Some reason for tenderness itself
In this life we have this Key, this emotion,
This emotion to do what we will with
An emotion so powerful it moves us to do great things
To do great things with our lives
An emotion so powerful it causes wars
An emotion that keeps our homes together
An emotion that saves and kills
An emotion moving among us
The moral is that tenderness betrays
So don't trust it completely
Some passion is a temptation to the end of reason
Some passion at lengths destroys logic and opposes law
Some tenderness has the power to drive apart the oceans
To send the storms to the ships at sea
Some tenderness has the power of magic in it
Some tenderness is the source of magic
Don't trust tenderness when it leads you to kill yourself
Don't trust it when it leads you to violence
There is death in all violence
And death is the enemy of hope
Oh, tenderness when pain was too much to bear
Oh source of all the undying rivers
Oh cosmos that created us all
And left us to fend for ourselves
What magic when logic broke our hearts
When the laws of the people destroyed what we loved
What was tenderness when it led us to our destruction
When we died on the plains of war
What led us to the heights of pain
When noone understood us
Oh light and life and that which was home
Oh little one in the snow
All passion has caused our destruction
Our fighting with one another
Our wars and violence and our loves
Our loves that were so passionate
God created mankind with tenderness in us
And aliens from other planets still don't understand us
The aliens don't understand the passion within us
That is leading us to these emotional extremes
But there is hope in tenderness,
When all is lost and unanswered
Some little voice within us that calls us
Some baby Jesus lying in a manger
Some divine hope coming to us from afar
That may lead us thence from our struggles
Some answer in all the chaos
Some rapping at the door
In my case it was Ptolemy's little voice
His little voice inside my heart
It led me to not commit suicide
And continues to save my life each day
Oh, Tenderness!
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

When you and I lay wrapped warm together
In a blanket that made our bed soft
The spiders darted on branches above our heads
But nonetheless we were safe there
We lay and listened to them come and go
And we kept each other safe
We promised each other everything would be okay
And we had faith in God
The world swept on on its great axis
Yet still you and I were safe there
None to destroy, I meditated and prayed
And felt the ebbing and growing of the seasons
And every time you rubbed your eyes from sleep
I felt salvation come like a kiss
I felt my purpose in you grow and grow
And I learned to be proud of myself
Like learning to walk on a shaky bough
I learned to walk by faith in God
Until all was at peace and all was calm
And then you and I lay there together
Thanks to the stars that shine in the sky
Thanks to the changing seasons
Thanks to the power that shifts and ebbs
To the power that answers my prayers
Thanks to that which taught me to walk
Without it we would have died
I will forever be grateful to that which is God
Shining out on the waters
And when I hold you in my arms
I will know that mercy found us here
That there is hope in going on
That there is peace and sustenance in the Lord
All grateful to the God that gives
I sing the song of the fish in the sea
Undying, ever eboullient
One of God's creations in his shining Grace
One of God's children under the stars
I sing with the spiders in the trees
With that which kills and takes away
With that that gives me life
All this I sing of thee
In Jesus' Name,
Amen

"Love Story"
The little flowers by the shore
Are whispering good things about you
The baby creatures in their nests
Are smiling up at you
The little children with their bowls of dinner
Are waving at you
The people who you helped in this life
Are asking God to bless you
The little times you wandered on
With nary a help to save you
Are filling a wave that crashes your shore
And brings relief from your suffering
The good you do in this day will be
Allotted to you in the morning
And when you smile the earth smiles too
And all things lost that nuzzle you
The soup that nourishes your soul
And the child that needs a meal
Are the distance between eternity
And where you need to go
You'll find the answers that you seek
If you look for them with real longing
Dreams come to those who pray
And wishes are answered
That quest that gives you the most trouble
May become the purpose of your life
We all give good things when we are able
And when we are tired we sleep
I had a man who saw my plight and
rushed headlong into my rescue
When he saw me safely on my way
Then he grew weary and died
I was sad when he died but I moved on
Because I knew how much he had loved me
I knew that he was exhausted in spirit
I knew he needed to go back to heaven
He kissed my forehead when he died and smiled at me so warmly
He told me that he loved me always
Then they wheeled him to his death while he was smiling
And he died peacefully and happily
I know my death will come when my task is done
My task to take care of Theodore
I know I will die when I have seen him through this life
And I too will die at peace
This man's name was Ptolemy or Raphael
His actual name won't be revealed
He believed in my quest with his whole heart
And he gave his life to me
He saw me like a flower
That he trained to grow out of the ground
And when he died I was saved
I was safe to go my way
He loved me in a way that defined him
And he loved me like a purpose
He was my gaurdian angel
And protected me from danger
I owe a life debt to him
It is him that I must protect
So I will leave him flowers
Each remaining day of my life
And when I die I will join him in paradise
And he will be my husband
I miss him and I loved him
The way that the breeze blows the meadow grass
In that way, I loved him
Without trying to at all
I miss him and the joy he brought me
Made me feel ten feet tall
In Jesus' Name,
Amen